Not what I wanted it to be.

photo by Tom Klubens
For the first time in 3 seasons, the Tornado Sirens lost their opening bout.
It was absolutely heartbreaking for us. We knew going in, that we had a tough battle. We were down so many of our good jammers! Blazin’ Ace was out with a back injury, Shady Layne for her knee, and Slammy Faye had broken her leg right before the Northstar bout.
We started off strong, putting points on the board, getting a good lead in. The Steel City Derby Demons however, starting playing really smart. They were using the rules very effectively against us. If they knocked us to the outside, the blocker would put on the breaks, forcing the girl knocked to the outside to either take a foul by cutting in front, or take a knee to come back in behind.
They also split the pack extremely well. Once again, the entire team of Steel City would put their breaks on, and fall back. The refs would call a split pack, and if we had their jammer, we would have to let go. If they had our jammer, they would simply speed up per the refs instructions, and still have our jammer. In the meantime, their jammer has come to the back again, and they would once again put on the breaks, while we would still be flying ahead. Effectively using our speed against us.
We had a LOT of penalties. Some deserved, some not so much. The much stricter WFTDA rules were kicking our asses. Our girls spent almost the entire time in the box. At the end of the first period it allowed their jammer Hurricane Heather, to rack up multiple grand slams against us in a single jam. We had no jammer on the track, and maybe 2 blockers. At that point they were 30 points ahead.
The final period was just so frustrating. We would get lead, and our jammer would get sent to the box. Once again, some legit, some… no. Not legit. The one I ALWAYS complain about really burned me up. Athena falls in front of JRoller, and JRoller falls on top of her and… you guessed it! Gets sent to the box for pushing from behind! Arrrgh! I will never understand how that gets called if I skate till I’m 100! With that logic, the falling skater should get called for tripping and back blocking! It just makes no sense!
Regardless, the Steel City Girls played a smart, clean game. Our new strategy? Get as many damn refs to our practices as possible, from as many leagues as possible, and have them call our scrimmages the way they would call a bout. As of right now, they’re calling our scrimmages pretty lightly, but then calling every little thing in the bout. It was incredibly confusing for us.

On the plus side, the Toyota Pavillion was PACKED. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen that many people in that building. (Nothing will ever beat our 4500 that we had in the Expo Hall, because the fire marshall will never again let that happen;) Our fans stayed to the last whistle, even when it was clear there was going to be no win for Naptown.
We go on to play one of the top ranked teams in the country, North Carolina in a couple of weeks. I’m looking at that one as a great learning experience;) I know we plan to redeem ourselves as much as humanly possible.
The best thing I can say about Steel City Derby Demons.. not only did they win, they won very well, as proved by their conduct at the after party. I’ve said it before, we’ve lost to other teams were were horrible winners. This was not the case with Steel City. So as always, my random drunken after party pictures.
Katya Lookin dancing.

Dill becomes a scarf model.

This was Hurricane Heather from Steel City break dancing. As soon as I saw the program, I was saying, “awww shit. They have a girl with dreadlocks”! In roller derby, dreadlocks=kick ass skater. I don’t know why that is, but they are always amazing. She was their top jammer for the night. Incredible skater.

I obviously, have no break dancing skills..
Dill is giving me the, “how many drinks have you had”? look.
This is probably the worst picture of me ever taken, but I couldn’t resist posting it. Because Touretta is checking out my boobs. That just screams “derby after party”.
Ivanna getting her groove on.

Kit gets her dance on as well.

Shadi getting her ass grabbed. This is one of the ways you know you are a derby girl. If you feel a hand on your ass at the bar, you don’t even flinch. You just assume it’s one of your girls, and you might even reach back to grab her boob. If it’s not one of your girls, you assume your girls have your back, and will jump the offender and beat him up before you even have a chance to register what is happening.

Why do we grab so much ass you ask? I really, really don’t know. It’s not something I really did before derby. I think it’s partially because you just get so comfortable always having your hands on these girls! When we’re on the track, there is a lot of talking and touching that the audience doesn’t see. My hand it usually on my team mates butt, back, stomach, arm, whatever. We’re always touching, letting each other know where we are… just in case they need us, or we need them.

Off the track we tend to let that touching carry over. We hug, spank, smack, grab… all in fun of course! It’s how we show our love for each other. That and frankly, the derby booty is just so amazing! It’s bigger, fuller, and way more muscular than the normal booty! We just always feel the need to show our appreciation!

I have no idea what Kit is doing here, or what is in her hand.

Farrah, Donnie, JRoller, Dill, and some random dude who hopped in the picture.

This is why Dill didn’t drive home.
And the reason I was not driving home.
And the reason I never would drive home after a party! That’s my niece Kyla. She is the cutest.